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And it does, at least in my experience. But the question lingers longer than one would like: How often should you text your partner? And when you text them, what should you say? I asked these very questions of seven experts, and they had a lot to messaage on the subject.
First off, as always, communication is key. If you're truly confused about how often you should text your partnerthen bring it up with them, relationship coach Melinda Carver tells Bustle. But the general consensus is that texting is good, and worthy of doing regularly throughout the day.
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This can contribute to a loss of desire. Here's everything you ever wanted to know about how to text your partner.
Psychologist Nikki Martinez agrees, telling Bustle that three to five times a day is mesdage. But that's assuming that you saw your partner in the morning and will see them again at night.
Romance, says. Does one of you like to text more often than the other, while your partner feels badgered?
It lets your partner know that you are thinking of them and that they are important to you. Be patient for a response," he says. Also keep your partner's work schedule in mind, says Carver. But Avoid Serious Topics Some would suggest that all texts include properly punctuated complete sentences. Others would err ger the side of "hey," "morn," "nite," and the like.
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Who's right? My feeling is that a text should never be longer than one or two sentences at the most. Texting can feel cold and impersonal, and might be creating distance rather than closeness," Tessina says.
If you're feeling awkward about it, then discuss it. If you need a hard and fast rule, relationship coach and psychic medium Cindi Sansone-Braff, author of Why Good People Should i message her Leave Bad Relationshipstells Bustle: "If you have something loving, kind, important, supportive or funny jessage say, then text away. If it's a serious topic, then that discussion is best reserved for face-to-face, or at least Facetime interactions.
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As for fighting over text? Avoid it. This can result in what I call 'textual abuse,' particularly if the person is texting obsessively. Like any kind of abuse, this can ruin a relationship.
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Should you just text to say hi? Or should it be more creative? You and me both, brother.
This is especially great if you know that your partner is having a rough day and needs shoudl lift If you shojld a text that just says 'Hi,' it seems a little bland. At least text something like 'Hi, I was just thinking about you and smiling! Oh wait, I can. Communicate as a lover, even when texting. If you're early in the relationship, saying something like "I hope you are having a good day" is nice, says Martinez.
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They love this exercise, and keep it up long after we stop working with it. What About Selfies? The best selfies are those that have a smile and confidence. If you are near an interesting object, work, or art, or if you're doing something silly, then go for it. Martinez agrees that selfies should be sent on an infrequent basis.
If there is a purpose, or something funny about it, then go for it. But not just gratuitous pictures of yourself.
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It could come off as self-absorbed. Martinez agrees. If you come across something that is an inside joke, or that you know they will really like, then send it along. But links can be bright spots in otherwise boring days, says Howard-Blackburn: "Sending funny links to your partner s can help them have a better day. Sexting keeps the attraction and affection ongoing between two people.
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Sexting can also be used as a form of foreplay. My rule of thumb for sexting is that I only do it when I know where my partner is and that it will be safe for them to receive that messags.
Tessina agrees. A lot can get lost in translation, and it can be a very superficial way of communicating to someone.
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But what if that's not possible? What if you're at work? Or what shoild you just prefer casual texts to a more formal conversation during the day? Images: Fotolia; WiffleGif 9.